Thursday, July 30, 2009

Horrify your mother, impress your friends: pee standing up


Dear friends ~

A couple years ago, we heard of this thing called 'women can pee standing up'. Yes, it's true; we thought that was pretty awesome, too. At that point all of our desires were encapsulated in the learning of this new thing, which we practiced with enthusiastic vigor--in the shower.

Fast forward to two years later and two weeks ago: we find ourselves at the Hawkins swimming hole, enjoying a lovely partially cloudy afternoon with good friends and good tea.

It occurred to Suj that she needed to pee, to which Amy replied, "Why don't you just pee off the cliff, standing up?" After a gentle reminder of our peeing days of yore and some cheeky smiles of encouragement, Suj stepped up to the plate...

Thirty-two. That's the approximate number of times we women-folk peed standing up that day: off cliffs, on the trailside, into the river, in the woods, you name it, we peed on it.

~ ~ ~

Simone de Beauvoir once said that women first observe a difference between the sexes by noticing that men pee standing up and women do not.

Contrary to popular belief, women can in fact pee easily standing up. And believe you, us. it's fun!

First, pull your pants down. Or take them off.

1.) Cock your hips forward
2.) Using either hand, make a V with your first and second fingers and spread the inside of your labia minora (inner lips) with it.
3.) Spread and lift your fingers a little, pulling up and out so the skin between your labia is pulled tight. This angles the opening of your urethra so you aren't peeing down your leg
4.) Pee with as much force as you can and try to stop the stream as suddenly as you can so that nothing gets on your clothes or your legs.
5.) It's a good idea to practice peeing in the shower. But it's never too early to venture outdoors!

There's no logical reason why women can't pee while standing. It's a feminist issue as far as we're concerned. Go for the 30 Degree arc! Go for the 10 meters. Have peeing competitions with your friends off cliffs, off porches, off roofs, and off sides.

Over and out,
Amy and Suj

Thursday, July 2, 2009

What's the difference, chicken?





















First of all, we're mostly vegetarian.

No really. What's the difference between these two jars of brownish liquid? Come on, take a guess or two. Maybe you think one liquid is darker than the other, or more opaque. Maybe one's more viscous. But a picture, a picture can only say so much.

We wish you could take a whiff of these jars! Even then, would you know the difference? What do you think we do with these jars of browinsh liquid? It's hard to say, we know. So here we go.

The one on the left is worm tea, and the one on the right is magic broth! These are both amazing and astonishing homemade (by us) liquids that have tremendous healing and nourishing qualities. Who knew?!

Worm Tea: You'll hear more about the worms. We promise. But as an intro, we grow worms . Worms eat our kitchen scraps. Worms, as they process our kitchen scraps, excrete a brownish liquid called worm tea, or compost tea. Our special worm condo is designed to let this liquid excretion drain into a well at the bottom of the condo tower. It's awesome. The worm tea is good for plants! Yay plants!

Magic Broth: Worm Tea is good for plants, and magic broth is good for humans! We make magic broth to keep ourselves healthy, especially when we're getting sick. Recipe for magic broth:

Boil some water, add roughly chopped onions, smashed garlic cloves, chopped or jarred ginger (not the pink stuff), and cayenne pepper. Experiment with the proportions and do what makes you feel good!

Let broth boil for about 20 minutes or more. Strain and add some lemon juice and honey.

Amazing magic broth for you to drink and stay healthy!

As much as we love them both, we have to make sure not to get our jars mixed up. As weird as we can be, we'll save the worm tea for the plants.

For now,
Suj and Amy

Welcome to hotgirls.blogspot.blogspot.com!

That's a mouthful isn't it? We really wanted to keep it simple, but do you realize how hard it is to get a blog title with the words "hot" and "girl." Who would have thought?

Well, welcome to our world. Our world is a world where anything is possible, where weird is wonderful, and everything is fair game.

Our intentions:
First and foremost, we intend to have fun. (This is fun.) Secondly, we don't want to forget the things that make our lives awesome. There are so many things that can take us away from awesomeness, but we bring each other back, keep each others' heads above water, and we gotta write it down. Sometimes the things we do blow our minds, sometimes we just do things that we want to write down. So maybe something we write about will tickle your brain, or blow it. Maybe not! and that's cool too.


What to expect:
Ha! No expectations allowed! we are so zen.


Signed,
Amy and Suj